What to Do While You Wait for What Comes Next

Waiting for a job offer. Waiting for test results. Waiting to meet the right person. Waiting for a child to come home, a prayer to be answered, a house to sell or a door to open. Some waits last days. Others last years.

Waiting is one of the hardest parts of life because it puts us face to face with what we cannot control. It is easy to feel stuck, as if life is on hold until the thing we are waiting for arrives. This post offers a different way to think about waiting and a simple plan for using a waiting season well.

Why waiting is so hard

Waiting is hard for a few reasons:

• Uncertainty. You do not know when, or if, what you hope for will come.
• Lack of control. Much of the outcome depends on other people or circumstances.
• Comparison. It can seem like everyone else is moving forward while you stand still.
• Time. Long waits wear down hope.

If you are tired of waiting, that is understandable. Scripture is full of people who waited: Abraham and Sarah for a child, Joseph in prison, Hannah for a son, Israel in exile. Their waiting was often painful. It was also not wasted.

Passive waiting and active waiting

There are two ways to wait.

Passive waiting puts life on hold. You check your email constantly, replay what might happen and postpone everything else until the answer comes. Days pass in a blur of worry.

Active waiting keeps living while you wait. You do what you can, release what you cannot and look for ways to grow and serve in the meantime. You still hope, and you still feel the ache, but your life does not stop.

Active waiting is not about pretending you do not care. It is about refusing to let the wait take everything else from you.

Prepare for what you hope for

Ask yourself, "If what I'm waiting for arrived tomorrow, what would I wish I had done?" Then do some of it now.

• Waiting for a job? Build a skill, update your portfolio, strengthen your network.
• Waiting for marriage? Grow in friendships, learn about healthy relationships, work on your own character.
• Waiting for a child? Prepare your heart and home, connect with others who understand.
• Waiting for a house to sell? Plan the move, declutter and research your next community.

Preparation turns waiting time into building time.

Serve someone else

Waiting can make our world feel very small, centered on what we lack. Serving others widens it again. Look for ways to help someone nearby:

• Encourage someone else who is waiting.
• Volunteer in your church or community.
• Help a neighbor with a practical need.
• Use your skills to support a cause you care about.

Serving does not make the wait shorter, but it often makes it more meaningful.

Grow where you are

Waiting seasons can be rich times for growth. You might:

• Read books that stretch you.
• Build a new habit you have been putting off.
• Deepen your prayer life or Bible study.
• Heal from old hurts with the help of a counselor.
• Learn something new just for joy.

Many people look back on waiting seasons as times when they grew in ways they never would have otherwise.

Pray honestly

For people of faith, waiting is often where prayer gets most honest. The Psalms show people pouring out impatience, confusion and longing to God. You can do the same. You do not need to pretend you are fine.

Scripture also offers hope for the waiting: "But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint." (Isaiah 40:31, KJV). Waiting on God is not empty waiting. It is a place where strength is renewed.

Faith does not guarantee you will receive exactly what you want on your timeline. It does offer the assurance that you are not alone in the wait.

A waiting-season plan

Here is a simple exercise to make your waiting more active. Take twenty minutes.

1. Name what you are waiting for. Write it in one sentence.
2. Name what is in your control. List the actions you can take toward it, even small ones.
3. Name what is not in your control. Write these down and, if you pray, offer them to God.
4. Choose one preparation step to take this week.
5. Choose one way to serve someone this month.
6. Choose one area to grow during this season.
7. Choose one person to share the wait with, someone who can encourage you along the way.

Keep your plan where you can see it. Revisit it monthly, especially if the wait continues.

When waiting gets heavy

Long waits can lead to discouragement, anxiety or depression. If the waiting has left you feeling hopeless, unable to sleep or function, or struggling with dark thoughts, please talk with your doctor or a licensed counselor. In the US, you can call or text 988 at any time. You do not have to carry the wait alone.

For help on the hardest days, Staying Steady Through a Long, Hard Season offers a minimum-day plan. And if you are tempted to compare your timeline with others', read How to Stop Comparing Your Life to Everyone Else's.